Today I was tased by UPD (University of Florida Police). I decided to experience the taser during my initial in-service training for the department. It wasn't mandatory, but I knew that I needed to experience it. I don't want to carry a weapon that I haven't been exposed to myself.
I remember being anxious but not scared before getting shot. I had no frame of reference, I just knew that it was going to hurt. Two of my buddies stood next to me and secured my upper body before the tase, so I wouldn't fall on my face (thanks Kenny and Bradley). The training Sergeant took aim at my back with the X26 (pictured above) and let me have it. The blast doors of the taser cartridge opened and two prongs stuck into my back. GRRAAAHHHHHHHHHH! I felt a strong shock which immediately overloaded my mind. It felt like my brain was screaming "PAIN! STOP THE PAIN!" Unfortunately my entire body was seized and I knew I had to take the full 5 second ride. Trust me when I tell you, 5 seconds of being tased is the longest 5 seconds of your life. The initial deployment of the taser is exactly five seconds, the shock will not stop early so I got every freaking bit of that 5 seconds. The feeling is very hard to explain. I would not recommend it unless you're in the law enforcement profession or you're just stupid.
After the exposure my body relaxed and I melted into the floor. Within one or two seconds I was at 95% I tried to jump up to my feet in excitement that it was over. My spotters reminded me to stay on the ground because I still had two prongs stuck into my back. The instructor plucked them out and I was done (yes, that also hurt).
As a human being I love to accrue "life experiences". This one was very memorable and I would prefer to not to experience it again. I just think it's awesome that I got tased by UPD. If you ever piss off a cop I would recommend saying, "Please Please Please Please Don't Tase Me SIR!"
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